I have no title for this post

I don't have a specific reason for blogging. At first, I blogged because my sister has a blog too. This was typical of me, suka ikut kakak, but that was more than three years ago (as you can see from the archives). So far, I have never deleted any of my entry, even though I am tempted to do so whenever I randomly read some of my earlier (ntah apape) posts. I have this indescribable feeling, reading myself grow this past few years. Okay, even if the growing part is only imaginary(!), at least I do feel nostalgic and 'tersenyum sendiri' when I am reminded of the things/events that I have gone through.

At one time, I was a bit influenced by someone's blog that is full of bashing and dissatisfaction about his surrounding bla bla bla. I started complaining, marah-marah in my blog, penuh dengan bahasa rojak dan perkataan-perkataan B. (not so much different from now pun)

Then, I decided, while other blogs were impressively written with real useful of information, serious issues, impeccable language, interesting pictures etc, my blog would focus on funny stories that happened to me. Even if they were not that funny, I tried to be comical. Bagi can la kan?

The better part of me wanted this blog to be a platform for me to educate readers. Ala-ala berdakwah secara berhikmah, dan lebih modern. So sometimes, I preach. Lightly. I don't know whether or not the message is delivered.

I also use my blog to feel important. Important enough that people actually want to read what (cool things) I do every other day, where I go, how I feel, my opinion about something. Sometimes I brag a little bit here, which is not good, but I still do it anyway.

I also share my feelings in this blog. My joy. My sadness. But this is not often because sometimes what I really feel inside, cannot be let out in the open.

Can I say I use my blog to update friends/families about what's happenig in my life? Hardly. Because my updates are very sporadic, and only a few people actually read them.

I wish this blog to be an outlet for my creativity (whatever it may be). Somehow the creative juice is drying up. Fast.

One thing I am guilty of is using my blog to communicate indirectly to 'whom it may concern' (ie the few people whom I know will read it), especially about things that I don't like/ disagree/ upset me/ can't directly tell face to face. Almost every blogger does that, aight?

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I've received some comments regarding my previous entry, friends and strangers giving me advice and encourangement.

You alls ni, buat I bersemangatlah!

So guess what?!

Yesterday, I finally called my manager! And he was ok about being my referee. It wasn't as bad as I imagined. Well, everyone can say that in retrospect right? "Ala, SPM dulu bukannya susah sangat pun".

I also went to see my lecturer yesterday to get my academic transcript. While I was there, of course I just had to ask about the results. She said that they will be out on the 10th of December. GrrR. She also said "generally students didn't do very good" when I asked her about it.

How's that gonna make me feel any better?

Owh owh, before I forgot. Yesterday, when I went to UiTM to collect the transcript, I was stopped at the entrance gate by a pak guard.

"Nak pergi mana ni?"

"Nak pergi menara"

"Nak buat ape?"

"Nak ambek transcript"

"Ooowh. Pelajar ke?"

"EX- pelajar"

"OK"

Lepas.

Okay, siapa tak perasan lagi.....EX pelajar ok? As in bekas pelajar!!! Hahaha. I am impressed myself by the choice of word. It actually helped me to get away from troubles. The car I was driving hasnt got any UiTM sticker, and what I was wearing tidaklah mengikut sahsiah rupa diri pelajar. Kalau saya masih pelajar, sure dah dapat saman.

I smiled all the way to level 11. Not only because of the prior incident, but also because I was walking down the road/route that I used to go through every day to class. The stairs. The lorong rokok. Tempat parking motor. And how can I miss, the elevator.

Lepas ni, dah takde dah nak jalan pergi kelas..........






Okay, takmo sedih-sedih.